This is a guest post by Eduard Ezeanu from People Skills Decoded.
I believe that one of the best things you can do in social interactions is make others feel good and get them excited. When you are able to excite people, they are naturally drawn to you and building a rich social life is easy.
Some persons naturally have an exciting persona. They are however, very rare. As a communication coach, one of my interests is to understand such persons, model their social behavior and help others become more exciting.
Here are the key things you can practice that in my perspective will make you a socially exciting person.
1. Be Loud.
In order to get other people excited, you need to be excited yourself. One essential trait of excited people is that they are loud. Their positive energy manifests in the intensity of their voice, their gestures and their behaviors, without going to the extreme.
By being excited when you interact with others, you can generate the same effect. Speak in a strong, firm voice and hold your head up when you do. Move with energy and passion; use your hands to gesture when you talk. Touch people a lot and move around the room a lot.
2. Talk with Everybody
Being exciting and being sociable are closely related. When for example, you’re at a party and you go around the room talking to everybody, you get yourself out of your head and into the moment, which is a big leap towards energizing others.
Also, as others notice that you are a very sociable person who interacts with everyone, this gets them excited about talking with you. If you are an introvert and have a lower level of social energy, all this socializing will use plenty of your energy, but you’ll be fine as long as you know when to stop and recharge.
3. Joke Around
One thing I’ve noticed is that people usual use the words ‘fun’ and ‘exciting’ together. This is because those who are fun are also exciting. I believe that in order to thrill others in a social interaction, having fun yourself needs to be a priority.
One tip I often give is to joke around a lot. This is not the same as telling jokes; this has to do rather with not taking things too seriously, acting aloof and finding something amusing in almost anything. Having fun and enjoying yourself is absolutely contagious in social interactions.
4. Take Risks
Probably the least exciting and most boring persons in social situations are those who play it safe. They don’t want to say the wrong thing, to upset somebody or to appear inadequate, so they watch every word they say and every gesture they make.
You don’t want to be this person. If you’re not comfortable with taking risks socially, you can become comfortable. How? By gradually taking more risks in social situations and putting more of yourself out there. You’ll be amazed how often people just start laughing and feel amused by something you thought was rude to say.
If you’re not used to being loud, sociable, fun and taking risks, it may not feel natural at first. The most important recommendation I can make is to keep practicing and push through. As your mind gets used with your new social behavior, it will feel more natural. I’ve seen this happening in my social life and in those of many of my coaching clients.
We all have inside of us a part that’s thrilling, positive, and exciting. It’s just that sometimes we need to practice expressing it and we need to give it permission in order for this part to surface.
Eduard Ezeanu is a communication coach with an attitude-based approach. If you enjoyed this article, also learn how to start a conversation and discover how to overcome shyness from two top articles on his People Skills Decoded blog.
Check out “A Roadmap To Relationships” for everything you need to know about building a healthy and fun social life. Find out more here.