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Dear Living and Breathing Person (Letter from a Dead Man)

Dear living and breathing person,

I bet you are more blessed than you realize.

I know at times life can be difficult,

Even painful.

But how lucky you are to still be alive,

And to still have choice.

Because no matter how young or old you are,

Or how much you suffer,

That choice is still there.

And it is what makes you alive,

And who you are.

I appreciate these things now,

Only because I no longer have them.

Once you’re dead,

All pain and pleasure is gone.

But worst of all,

All choice is gone as well.

But you,

You’re still alive.

You’re still conscious.

You’re still thinking.

You’re still feeling.

And you’re still deciding and acting.

You still have a chance,

To be an influence on your world,

To change others,

And to do something remarkable with your time.

Time is too precious.

And everyday that passes,

You have the opportunity to decide,

To live well,

To live heroically,

And to be happy.

Live consciously,

And make those decisions.


Before it is too late.

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50 Life Questions With No Easy Answers

Life is filled with a lot of difficult and unanswered question. In many ways, these uncertainties add to the mystery and amazement of life. A short question, like “Who am I?” can lead to hours of introspecting and debating among friends and family. And by the end of it, we probably still won’t be able to agree on an answer.

In my experience, contemplating the answers to these questions sharpens our thinking and can give us a deeper understanding of ourselves and life in general.

Read the rest…

75 Affirmations for Self Improvement


In psychology, there is a saying that “neurons that fire together wire together.”

So the more we practice having certain thoughts or beliefs that serve our success, happiness, and well-being – the more naturally those thoughts and beliefs will play themselves out in our everyday lives.

Affirmations are one great way to develop these new thought patterns and make them become second-nature. They are simple positive statements that we repeat to ourselves inside our minds.

Every morning you can practice repeating positive affirmations to yourself with a clear and focused mind. And over time, these beliefs begin to take root inside your brain.

This article provides 75 different affirmations geared toward self improvement. Try to find the affirmations that “click” with you the most – or use this list as inspiration to create your own unique affirmations.

I highly recommend creating a document titled “Positive Affirmations” and starting a collection of your own. I find it can be a very positive resource to draw from when you need an extra boost.

You can start by choosing 5-7 affirmations from my personal list below.

Read the rest…

I’m The Prize: An Affirmation To Increase Self-Worth

I’m The Prize

“I’m the prize” is a common affirmation in the Pick Up Artist (PUA) community, but I believe it can be applied to all kinds of relationships. “I’m the prize” is about setting expectations for yourself and the kinds of relationships you want to cultivate in your life. It’s the belief that you deserve to be treated a certain way, because you are worthy of relationships that enrich your life.

You see, the opposite of a person with an “I’m the prize” mentality is someone who constantly sells themselves short. They don’t believe they deserve the kinds of relationships they ultimately want, so they settle for “second best.” Eventually they get used to “second best” – being just good enough – and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

I’m convinced that being content with mediocrity is the latest plague, and I intend to help cure it. Being content with what you have is not the same thing as being genuinely happy. To be genuinely happy you need to live in accordance to your values, not settle for less.

People have a hard time getting what they want out of life, especially when they don’t know what they want. The very first thing you need to do is define what you value in others. If you’re one of those people who constantly finds themselves attracting the same non-fulfilling relationships, you probably need to reflect on your core values and see where you are making unnecessary sacrifices. One exercise I do that helps clarify what I want is to write out my values. You can do it in a list form, or write a short essay describing the types of people in your life you want to connect with. This will help prime your mind to look out for these values throughout your day-to-day interactions.

How to BE the “Prize”

Monotonously repeating an affirmation over and over again will be futile, especially if you don’t consciously act in accordance to those beliefs. I guarantee that no matter how many times you tell yourself “I’m the prize,” you won’t get anywhere unless you embody that affirmation, by actually being what you say you want to be.

You simply can’t create fulfilling relationships in your life solely by demanding them – you need to offer real value. All relationships are a kind of psychological “exchange.”

What value do you offer to others?

I’m obviously not just talking about gifts or money, but what psychological value do you offer others? Start by defining your strengths. What will make people want to be around you more? Are you: Kind? Understanding? Funny? Adventurous? Creative? Intelligent?

Identify your positive attributes. Write out a list of each, or write a short essay describing what is so good about you. This can be a great boost to your self-esteem, and it can also help clarify who you are as a person. Also, identify attributes that you want to work on and improve. Write a separate list or essay describing the things you need to do in order to improve yourself in the future. Just because you are the prize doesn’t mean you can’t improve yourself to be even better than you already are. Those who are the prize are always looking for new ways to grow and expand themselves. They apply a winning attitude to everything that they do.

And please don’t be too modest, everyone has positive qualities about themselves. Don’t be afraid to reveal these positive qualities when around others. They make you who you are, and people are going to appreciate you more when you let your personality shine through, rather than when you hide it and don’t believe in yourself.

Taming the ego

Okay, I understand that saying “I’m the prize” can sound a bit arrogant and egotistical. I certainly don’t want you to announce it out loud to others. Instead, it should be an internal and unspoken thought process. It’s a general attitude you have about yourself, the feeling that you are capable and deserving of positive relationships.

Don’t think of “I’m the prize” as a means of boasting or bragging, or trying to artificially inflate your value in front of others. A lot of people in the PUA community come up with little games and tricks that they believe “demonstrate higher value,” when really it’s a superficial cover for a shallow personality. If you ARE the prize, you don’t need to come up with tactics to demonstrate it. It should just emanate from you naturally, because that is who you are.

“I’m the prize” isn’t about tricking yourself (or other people) into believing you are something you are not. Instead, it is about building your potential, and being your best self using the resources you have available in the present moment. Be optimistic about yourself, but pragmatic. Believe you can achieve your values, but don’t expect the whole world to tilt its axis just for you, it’s not going to happen.

Being the prize is altruistic

If someone perceives you as a prize, that implies that they see value in you (as I’ve mentioned above). In that way, I see “I’m the prize” as not just about self-improvement, but also improving the world around you. When you are capable of building value in other people’s lives, they become better off, not just you.

In my post on magnetic self-esteem, I also describe how many people look up to those who are self-worthy. When we embody this characteristic, we inspire and motivate others to do the same. We become a type of role model, and the world could always use more positive role models.

Don’t just be the prize for yourself, be it for others as well.

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Balancing Meditation: A Mind-Body Exercise

Balancing Meditation

Often times, individuals begin their meditation practice by using the breath as their main object of focus. But I’ve also written about how we can meditate on other senses, such as meditating on sounds, by making note of the different auditory sensations, as well as meditating on vision, like a sky gazing meditation during a sunset, or looking up at the stars on a clear night.

A big theme of this blog is to take awareness that we have cultivated during meditation and apply it to different senses, different experiences, and different actions. In truth, you can take any sense and use it as an object of meditation. And this includes our sense of balance.

I was messing around in my backyard the other day and I discovered a brick and a plank of wood. I laid down the brick on its side and then put the wood on top of it. Then, I stood on top of my new apparatus and tried to maintain my balance.

I became really focused on how difficult it was for me to keep a still posture. And as I became more aware, I noticed the subtleties of my weight shifting across the board. From one side to the other, and back again. I noticed when my feet were closer together it was easier for me to keep my composure, but when they were further apart it became more difficult. I kept experimenting, exploring, and discovering new aspects of my body and muscle control.

It fascinates me how taking our awareness and applying it to something as simple as balance can reveal new complexities about our conscious experience. I usually take my balance for granted. I get up everyday, walk around, and hardly ever think about how my weight is distributed throughout my body or how my body and muscles work together to keep me upright. But this is hugely important for someone who practices yoga, gymnastics, likes to skateboard, or maybe someone who is getting older and more clumsy.

Being more aware of our balance and practicing balance can have health and fitness benefits like:

  • Improving muscle control.
  • Improving posture.
  • Improving blood flow.

It can also strengthen our mind-body connection by:

  • Increasing concentration.
  • Increasing body awareness.

It’s a really simple and easy thing to practice. It’s not hard to just come up with some kind of “balancing apparatus” and begin playing with it. I personally find it really fun and a good exercise in self-awareness. I recommend giving it a go.

For some reason when I first started thinking about “balancing meditation” I didn’t make the connection that it was in fact a kind of yoga practice. Haha. Either way, this is something I want to keep practicing and integrating into my health routine. Being able to hold my body more still and calmly (and improving my muscle control) seems like a really desirable trait for long-run health and fitness. It also requires an interesting one-pointedness between both mind and body.

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