A big part of this influence comes from what we inherit from our genes, which we don’t have much control over. However, diet and exercise also play an important role in maintaining a healthy body and healthy mind – and those are things that we do have the power to change.

Here are some of the latest findings on the importance of diet and exercise in mental health, as well as some suggestions on how to improve these aspects of our lives.

What you eat affects your brain.

Your brain needs nutrients and a healthy diet in order for it function at its best.

High-powered brain foods are rich in complex carbohydrates (your brain’s primary source of energy), fiber (which improves absorption of necessary vitamins and minerals), lean protein (for building new neurotransmitters), and unsaturated fats (especially omega-3 fatty acids, which improve cognitive abilities).

You can satisfy most of these nutritional needs by following a healthy diet rich in fresh vegetables, fruit, whole grains, and high-quality meat and fish. Psychology studies have found that a healthy diet that follows these core food groups can significantly lower the risk of psychological disorders such as anxiety and depression.

In contrast, an unhealthy diet contains a lot of processed foods and saturated fats, like potato chips, fried foods, chocolate, sweets, ice cream, and other junk food. These are not only associated with physical problems like heart disease and obesity, but have also shown in recent studies to lead to long-term problems in mental health.

The scientific journal PLoS One published a longitudinal study in 2011 showing that changes in diet correlated with changes in mental health. Among 2,000 participants, those who made healthy changes to their diet experienced improved mental health, while participants who made unhealthy changes to their diet experienced a deterioration in mental health. This is one of many empirical examples of how our diets affect our brains.

Key “brain foods” to keep in mind and why.

• Fish, eggs, and grass-fed meats. Several studies have shown a strong association between seafood consumption and mental health, especially mood disorders. This is because most fish (as well as eggs and grass-fed meat) contain high levels of omega-3 fatty acids, which have been shown to lower depression and anxiety levels, as well as improve memory and cognition. Limited research also suggests that omega-3 fatty acids may be effective in preventing psychotic symptoms in those with schizophrenia. In a six-month study of those with schizophrenia, those who were treated with E-EPA supplements (a concentrate of omega-3 fatty acids) showed a significant increase in grey and white matter, while those who took a placebo had shown a loss in cerebral tissue. Foods such as fish, eggs, and grass-fed meats are widely considered to play an important role in neural growth and healthy brain functioning.
• Nuts and seeds. Many nuts and seeds are also good sources of omega-3 fatty acids, especially butternuts, walnuts, chia seed, and flax. Nuts and seeds are also a great source of protein, fiber, and vitamins – all of which your brain needs to function most effectively. If you are vegan or vegetarian, nuts and seeds are essential for maintaining a healthy body and mind, since they provide a lot of the same nutritional value that can’t be found in other non-animal food products.

• Whole grains. Whole wheat breads, grains and pasta are great sources of complex carbohydrates, fiber, and B vitamins. Your brain needs a steady supply of carbohydrates, which your body breaks down into glucose, the brain’s main source of energy. When glucose is low, psychological processes that require mental effort (like self-control and conscious decision-making) are impaired. Therefore, it’s important that you give your brain the energy it needs to function effectively throughout the day. Without the right amount of complex carbohydrates, your brain will become fatigued and inefficient – it needs energy to function! Other excellent sources of complex carbohydrates include beans, legumes, fruits, and vegetables.
• Many fruits and vegetables. Many fruits and vegetables contain loads of essential vitamins, dietary fibers, carbohydrates, and antioxidants which improve brain function. Blueberries and strawberries, for example, have shown to improve memory and cognition by cleaning out toxins in the brain that cause age-related memory loss and mental decline. Most fruits and vegetables play an important role in maintaining a healthy and balanced diet. It is therefore preferred that you eat a variety of different fruits and vegetables throughout your day, rather than just increasing the quantity of any one specific fruit.
• Water. Up to 70% of our brains are water. Drinking water is therefore essential for keeping our bodies and brains hydrated. When we don’t get enough water each day, this can lead to long-term declines in brain functioning, including stress and fatigue. Water is key for delivering nutrients to our brains, keeping them healthy, as well as eliminating toxins.
• Coffee or tea. Studies show that a moderate amount of caffeine can be beneficial toward brain health. For example, one study found that coffee can slow down dementia and Alzheimer’s disease, as well as improve cognitive functioning and alertness. Similar effects have been found in green tea, which also includes powerful antioxidants that help clean out the brain. Some research has also suggested that caffeine can mimic some of the effects of antidepressants.

There’s no conclusive research on what exactly the “best diet” is for mental health. In all likelihood, there is probably no such thing, as it probably depends on many factors including each individual’s biochemistry and the combination of foods they consume as a whole.

That being said, I think we all have an intuitive sense of what makes “healthy” foods and what makes “unhealthy” foods. The truth is most of us probably don’t need to read a book on nutrition to begin making more health-conscious choices. When we choose to have that piece of cake while watching our favorite TV show, instead of the bowl of salad, we know deep-down that we are choosing the less healthy option.

So while some of these health suggestions may seem like commonsense, please remember that the bigger point here is that what we choose to eat matters to our brains and mental health. Therefore, maintaining a healthy diet plays a significant role in also keeping our brains working properly.

Please talk with your doctor and do more research before making any dramatic changes to your diet.

Exercise improves mental health and cognitive ability.

Over the past decade, research has shown that exercise is just as important to our mental health as maintaining a balanced diet. In a 2011 issue of the Journal of Applied Physiology, researchers did a meta-analysis of over 100 studies looking into the effects of aerobic exercise and strength training on mental health and cognitive ability.

One finding was that exercise during childhood led to a faster rate of cognitive development. Children who were physically inactive tended to perform worse on academic exams and neuropsychological tests, while children who exercised showed improvements in memory, attention, and decision-making.

This was also found to be true in younger and older adults. According to researchers, there is solid evidence that exercise can benefit a variety of executive functions, including multi-tasking, planning, and self-control. Neuroscientists have also done fMRI scans in humans and rats showing that exercise can lead to increases in brain volume, specifically in areas of the brain associated with cognition and memory.

Exercise has also proven to be an effective treatment for several mental disorders. One study published in a 2011 issue of the Journal of Clinical Psychiatry found that exercise can substitute as a second medication for those with depression. Often depressed patients begin to feel better when they receive their first medication, but they don’t feel completely well. In the past, psychiatrists have prescribed a second medication, but now research shows that prescribing exercise instead can be just as, if not more effective.

One of the reasons exercise may help alleviate depression is because it releases neurotransmitters like endorphins, serotonin, and anandamide, which are known to elevate mood and feelings of pleasure. This experience is sometimes referred to as “runner’s high,” and these biochemical levels are known to stay elevated in the body for up to several weeks at a time, contributing to improvements in happiness and increased self-esteem.

Exercise has also been known to increase neural growth and neuroplasticity, which helps protect against neurodegenerative diseases such as dementia and other age-related declines in mental health and cognitive ability.

Minimize alcohol, cigarettes, and drug use.

The other aspect of our physical and mental health are dangerous habits that include excessive alcohol, cigarettes, and drug use. In many ways, substance abuse is a mental illness all on its own. It’s also true, however, that many people who engage in substance abuse can develop other brain abnormalities and mental illnesses later in life, such as alcohol-induced brain damage.

Of course, some drugs can be taken in moderation and not have any adverse effects on your physical or mental health. Every now and then a study comes out showing how the occasional glass of wine or marijuana joint can actually improve certain aspects of our physical and mental health. But even so, it’s important to keep moderation in mind at all times.

There are also some drugs that are probably best avoided altogether. Hard drugs like heroin and cocaine often serve very little long-term benefit physically or mentally (if at all), and the costs just far outweigh the gains.

Make a conscious choice to be smarter about drugs. I can’t realistically tell everyone to avoid alcohol or smoking altogether, but I think it’s wise to do these things with some caution and mindfulness. Because like all things that you consume into your body, it’s going to affect your brain and mental health in some way.

Try one small habit change – just for this week.

I’ve now covered 3 different aspects of your physical and mental health that you could begin improving on today if you really wanted to.

Of course, I understand that making these changes can seem daunting at first. There’s a lot to chew on in this article, and you certainly can’t transform yourself overnight.

By taking small steps, however, you can begin to make changes for the long-term.

If you want to start making changes in your health today, I recommend checking out Try One Small Habit Change – Just for This Week. This article challenges you to a one week experiment on changing one habit. For example, practice substituting soda with water for one week.

By making steady, gradual changes over time, we can instill habits that greatly improve our physical and mental health in the long-term.

Psychologists use a procedure called “The Rubber Hand Illusion” to challenge an individual’s sense of body ownership. A recently published study showed that schizophrenics – who already exhibit a weak sense of self – experienced the illusion to a greater degree than healthy controls.

Other research suggests that focused physical exercise can help improve body ownership and thereby alleviate some symptoms of schizophrenia.

Body Ownership and “The Rubber Hand Illusion”

In the “The Rubber Hand Illusion,” participants begin to perceive a rubber hand as if it was a part of their own body. The experiment is fairly simple, but it can have some wild effects.

Researchers hide one of your hands behind a small sheet and then put a rubber hand into view. They then stroke a paintbrush along both your real hand (the one that’s hidden), and the rubber one.

What happens among two thirds of healthy participants is that they begin to perceive that the sensations of the paintbrush are actually coming from the rubber hand, not their real one. When participants are then asked to close their eyes and point toward their real hand, many will point closer toward the rubber one instead.

The “Rubber Hand Illusion” is a play on vision, touch, and body posture (proprioception). Often the stronger the effect, the less someone has a true sense of “body ownership.” To get a better idea on how the experiment works, you can check out a video of the illusion below:

Schizophrenia and “The Rubber Hand Illusion”

Those with schizophrenia are already known to have a poor concept of self, a big part of which includes their sense of “body ownership.”

In a recently reported study, schizophrenics were shown to have a much more heightened effect when undergoing this “Rubber Hand Illusion.” When asked to point toward their real hand, schizophrenics pointed significantly closer to the rubber one than their real one when compared to healthy controls. One participant in the study even reported floating completely above their body for about 15 minutes – a very rare case of an “out of body experience” (OBE) being spontaneously produced in the laboratory.

These findings fit perfectly with the already existing theory that those with schizophrenia have a weaker sense of self and body ownership.

The Importance of Physical Exercise for Schizophrenics

Previous research has shown that physical exercise can help reduce symptoms of schizophrenia (see here and here).

This is because physical exercise, especially focused activities like yoga and dance, can help improve an individual’s body awareness and body ownership.

In this article, I attempt to answer these important but often difficult questions. I then share 5 fundamentals on Regaining Consciousness, as laid out by psychology blogger Sam Spurlin. These fundamentals aim to cultivate a higher state of awareness toward key areas of our life, such as our values, health, work, thinking, and relationships.

Consciousness is the bedrock of your personal development.

Consciousness is more than just a passing thought, feeling, memory, or imagination, but the underlying awareness that permeates every experience you’ll ever have.

In order to define consciousness, it helps to first think of it as a spectrum of awareness.

On one end of the spectrum, there are lower levels of consciousness, including being distracted, lazy or bored. Usually in these states, we maintain some awareness of our environment, but not very much. We can probably get a lot of tedious chores done while being distracted or bored, but this isn’t the optimal state you want to be in when trying to achieve a big or meaningful goal.

The very lowest levels of consciousness are states like drug intoxication, sleep, or a coma, where we actually aren’t conscious at all – but unconscious. Most of the time we don’t get anything productive or creative done in these states (mostly because “you” aren’t actually around when you’re unconscious).

And on the opposite end of the spectrum, there are very high states of consciousness, like mindfulness and flow. These are states of mind where an individual is highly attentive and engaged with their environment, often interacting with it in very skillful and sophisticated ways (like a painter working on their masterpiece, a baseball player pitching a perfect game, or a life-long businessman pitching a big sale).

Unlike lower levels of consciousness, higher levels of consciousness are very optimal for goal-achieving and success in virtually any domain of life. This is because higher levels of consciousness always include supreme focus and discipline.

What I want you to understand is that, ultimately, the level of consciousness we cultivate throughout our day is the most fundamental components to our well-being and success. Personal development without conscious living is simply impossible – the more aware we are of ourselves and our environment, the more power and control we have to change it.

5 Steps Toward Regaining Consciousness

Sam Spurlin writes about Regaining Consciousness in his insightful e-book. The lessons covered are intuitive and thought-provoking, but also widely applicable to cultivating consciousness toward different (and often underestimated) areas in our life.

It reminds me of a more “contemporary” version of the popular Mindfulness in Plain English, because it’s primary focus is how to practice healthy consciousness throughout our daily activities (even with common things like eating and exercise) – not just during meditation.

Sam understands that cultivating consciousness is not just for Zen monks camping out in some cave, but something that can also be applied to the “American way” of living too. This means we can work on regaining consciousness even with a 9-5 job, bills to pay, and a family to take care of.

In the book there are 5 crucial steps laid out that anyone can follow to facilitate conscious living. I’m going to summarize each step here, but if you really want to read more about each one, I recommend you check out his book for yourself. I honestly couldn’t put it down when I first started it.

Find your values.

Going through life without a clear sense of our values and goals is a sure-fire way to not find happiness. Many people live their lives aimlessly and unconsciously (like a puppet on strings), without ever introspecting and asking themselves, “What do I really want in life? What direction do I want to go in?” To cultivate more consciousness toward our values in life, Sam suggests:

• Make a list of core values and narrow it down to your top 3-5. Imagine what your life would be like if you acted in accordance with these values.
• Don’t chase other people’s dreams – question the values you learn from authority figures, the media, TV, and pop culture.
• Listen to your heart and mind above all else. Do what you honestly think is right.
• Have priorities. Sure, you may value playing video games, but is it more important than taking care of your family or studying for school or doing something more creative like writing a song? It’s up to you.

Take control of your health.

Consciousness toward our health is absolutely crucial for physical and mental well-being. Everyday we make decisions that have to do with our bodies: what we choose to consume, and what kind of physical activities we choose to partake in. The more aware we are of what we eat and how much exercise we get, the better off our health will be. Sam suggests we:

• Make small and deliberate decisions to be healthier. Start by cutting down soda intake and replacing it with water. Or try just going for a short walk every morning. Start with little things and build from there.
• Be a conscious eater. When you eat, don’t distract yourself by reading the paper or surfing the internet. Instead, pay very close attention to how the food tastes and how your body is reacting to it.
• Tune into your body during physical exercise. For example, while running pay close attention to the mechanics of your legs/body, the motions of your breathing, and any other pain/aches/sensations in your body that you may be experiencing. Think of any physical activity as a way of meditating – and your body is the object of your meditation.
• Learn from the wisdom of your body. Our body is always sending us signals on it’s condition (like when you are hungry, when you need to use the restroom, when you tore a muscle, etc.) The more we are aware of these signals, the better we can respond to our body’s needs. You’d probably be surprised on just how much you can learn from your body if you listen to it.

Doing work that matters.

Next to our health, one of the biggest factors in achieving happiness is doing meaningful work with our lives. A dead-end job that doesn’t align with our values can feel like a curse. Instead of inspiring us and motivating us, it drains us of our energy and leaves us feeling empty inside. On the other hand, a meaningful job that actually matters to us is drastically more fulfilling. Here’s what Sam recommends we do:

• Re-evaluate your current job. What do you like about it (if anything)? What purpose do you fulfill? Does it align with your values?
• If you aren’t happy with your job, begin searching for alternative career paths that you find more fulfilling. In the book, Sam mentions how he used to be a teacher (and he liked his job), but becoming self-employed aligned with more of his values and interests, so he made the switch.
• Pay attention to activities that put you into a state of engagement and flow. Very often these passions of yours can point you in the right direction when choosing a job or career.
• A big goal in my personal life is to find work that I love but also serves an important function in improving society.

Master your mind with conscious thinking.

A big part of Regaining Consciousness is taking more control over our education, thoughts, beliefs, and perspective. Throughout the guide, Sam asks us to challenge our old assumptions and beliefs, accept our ignorance about certain topics, and willingly seek to improve our knowledge and attitude about the world. He recommends you:

• Acknowledge that you have a limited perspective. You don’t know everything, so don’t be stubborn and act like you do.
• Try to look beyond any biases or prejudices you may have by looking at new information as neutrally as possible.
• Become an active learner. Choose a topic that has always fascinated you, go to the library, and then take out a few books on it. Read up on it and share what you learned with others.
• Go “Wikipedia surfing.” Go to an article, read through, it and click on any links that interest you. Keep continuing the process until you feel you have learned something new and interesting that you didn’t know before.
• Always maintain a healthy curiosity and willingness to learn. We don’t stop being students after we graduate high school or college.
• Listen to everyone’s views. Respect that other people may have different experiences, knowledge, and beliefs than you do. Ignore the trap of having to label everything “right” or “wrong.”

Nurturing conscious relationships.

One of the most important steps toward conscious living is becoming more aware of the relationships that make up our world. For some of us, we may cling onto toxic relationships that end up hurting both ourselves and the other person. For others, we may have trouble cultivating meaningful relationships. In both cases, cultivating higher consciousness is crucial. Some of Sam’s suggestions include:

• Recognize the “vampires” in your life. These are people who are always being negative and sucking the energy out of you. They are the buzz-kill to every party and the rain to every parade. Stay far away from them. They are miserable – and they expect you to be miserable too.
• Associate with “vampire slayers.” Vampire slayers are people who crush negativity in their lives. Instead of draining you of energy, they empower and motivate you. They encourage you to pursue your values and goals, and they are always around to lend a helping hand when you need it.
• The essential rule of cultivating conscious relationships is to invest positive energy into the relationships that are valuable to us, and let the one’s that aren’t valuable fizzle out. Although it may be painful to get rid of old friends, it is sometimes the necessary thing to do.

Free Preview of “Regaining Consciousness.”

If you visit the Regaining Consciousness page you can check out the first 15+ pages absolutely free.

My reasoning is simple: those who don’t believe in themselves automatically inhibit their potential by not thinking they are capable or deserving of achieving their values and goals in life.

But those who do believe in themselves are willing to do their very best in whatever situation they find themselves in. And even when they fail, they believe they can learn from it and overcome it.

The big difference? One person feels capable, the other doesn’t. One tries their best, the other gives up after the tiniest bit of struggle.

Healthy self-esteem can make all the difference between a person who achieves their dreams and goals, and a person who never even gives themselves a fair chance. Without it, it doesn’t matter how many strengths or talents you have, because in all likelihood you’ll never have the courage to use them.

So how we think about ourselves and treat ourselves is incredibly important, and it’s not something to be taken lightly.

Here are some commonsense tips and suggestions I have for anyone who is working on building their self-esteem:

1. Reflect on your strengths and accomplishments.

Deep down, I really believe that everyone offers some kind of value to this world. We all have our own particular strengths and talents, and when we focus on these good aspects of ourselves, we are more likely to build off of them and accomplish some pretty remarkable things in the process.

A lot of people have strengths that they don’t acknowledge for whatever reason. Maybe they are bashful. Maybe they don’t want to show off.

But I say when we make our strengths shine we make the world a better place. We create something valuable, and we inspire others to purse their strengths as well. Believing in yourself doesn’t have to just be about you, it can be about how you can improve society as a whole. Feeling good about yourself doesn’t need to be perceived as a “selfish” or “narcissistic” thing.

2. Exercise and stay healthy.

An important thing to remember about mental health is that our mind and bodies are one and the same. If you treat your body like crap, then you’re probably going to psychologically feel like crap too.

Recent research has made it crystal clear that those who take care of their bodies and exercise frequently show less signs of depression, anxiety, and low self-esteem.

In general, people who take care of their bodies have more respect for themselves. No one feels good after munching on a full bag of Doritos or a whole night of heavy drinking. Learn how to minimize your bad habits and start investing more time eating healthier and trying to stay fit.

Start simple by cutting out all soda or going for morning walks every other day. Once you start building healthy habits they will begin to come second-nature. I guarantee you will start feeling better about yourself almost right away.

3. Accept things you can’t change.

Everyone has some things about their life that aren’t perfect. Some of those things we have control over, but a lot of those things we don’t have control over (like certain physical attributes, genetic limitations, and other environmental factors).

Despite these shortcomings, we have to learn to accept them – without feeling bitter, assigning blame, or fostering negativity toward ourselves.

Accept the fact that everyone is dealt a different hand in this game of life, and some people have to face more obstacles than others.

It wasn’t Viktor Frankl’s fault that he was a Jew during the Holocaust and thus got locked up in a concentration camp for most of his life. However, he learned to find satisfaction in his life despite these external circumstances – by accepting them and instead focusing on the aspects of life he did have control over.

4. Learn how to reframe.

Reframing is learning how to change your perspective about a certain situation or experience.

For example, successful people (in any domain of life) often view “failures” as learning experiences – and by looking at their failures from this perspective they become more motivated to improve themselves.

On the other hand, people who don’t have this perspective often view “failures” as evidence of their incompetence. Instead of being educated and motivated by them, they think of them as proof that they should quit.

If you sign up for my newsletter then you’ll get a free short guide on “How to Reframe,” which shares several types of reframes we can apply to different areas of our life.

5. Have a passion.

A passion is any activity that we find intrinsically satisfying. Often when we talk about it, people notice a fire in our souls. And when we actually engage in the activity, we get lost in a state of flow – hours go by, but we don’t notice because we are so indulged in what we are doing.

Everyone needs a passion. Everyone needs that something that resonates deeply and makes them tick.

Maybe your passion is music, or baseball, or computer programming, or photography, or parenting? Maybe it is all of the above.

Most people don’t just have one single passion, but multiple ones. The important thing is that we have something to get excited about. Because without a passion our lives can quickly become very dull.

6. Be social.

No matter how introverted or extroverted you may be, I believe everyone needs to have some kind of social life. Even if your social circle is only 2-3 close friends, it’s important that you have people who support you and are on your side.

For many reasons, humans have evolved to be social creatures. By working together, we have constructed many institutions (marriage, technology, science, government) that have enhanced our ability to survive and adapt to our environment.

Individuals that fail to fulfill their duties as a social being often feel depressed and isolated. They go through life with no sense of “belonging” (like the kind Maslow defines in his “Hierarchy of Needs”) and it becomes difficult to build positive and rewarding relationships that improve our lives.

Although we may like to believe that self-esteem is something that is solely about us – the truth is that our self-esteem is highly dependent on our ability to connect with others in a meaningful way.

If you suffer from social anxiety and have a hard time making new friends, I highly recommend Sean Cooper’s The Shyness and Social Anxiety System. It’s a self-help workbook that uses scientifically proven techniques in Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT) to help individuals reduce their stress and anxiety around others.

7. Adopt a confident posture.

A lot of research in psychology demonstrates that you become what you pretend to be. In other words, by adopting a confident posture and using body language as if we have high self-esteem, very often those habits begin spilling over into our attitude and self-perception.

A straight back, open posture, and warm smile are some of the key habits that studies have shown increase our well-being and self-esteem. And by mimicking these behaviors (even if at first it seems a bit fake), we can begin to adopt a more positive perception of ourselves.

8. Poke fun at yourself.

I’ve noticed that those with the highest self-esteem are also the first people to poke fun at themselves

This is probably because individuals with true self-esteem don’t feel the need to take themselves too seriously. They have a healthy and modest ego, so they see little need to boast, brag, or try to impress everyone.

Instead, they acknowledge their imperfections with a sense of humility and humor.

When they make a mistake, they give a sincere apology. And when something embarrassing happens to them, they see it as an opportunity to share a funny story in exchange for a few laughs.

When you become comfortable in your own skin, you are often much more willing to take wise cracks about yourself around other people. The irony is that when you do this people end up actually liking you more (even though you aren’t deliberately trying to “win” anyone over or make yourself out to be anyone who you aren’t).

9. Respect everyone as equals.

Another trend I find is that those who have deep-down insecurities about themselves often disrespect and mistreat others.

It’s possible that they find themselves to be insecure with who they are, so they project that insecurity onto others in order to make themselves feel better.

Part of the problem comes from the “social comparison trap.” Many people unconsciously (and sometimes consciously) compare themselves to other people and judge whose situation is “better” or “worse.” This kind of judgmental thinking can often hurt ourselves, because it gives the appearance that life is a constant conflict between “us” and “them.” It can also lead us to believe that the “grass is always greener on the other side,” and we can never find contentment with our own lot in life.

Instead, I recommend (as corny as it may sound) that we try to take a more egalitarian approach to how we view others. I sincerely believe that there is good in everyone and everyone has their own unique place in this world (hey, I said it wasn’t going to get corny), therefore, I have a strong belief that everyone is deserving of some respect (even those who may have been misguided at some point in their life).

As Plato wisely said, “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.”

And I find that when you show compassion toward others, it becomes that much easier to show compassion toward yourself as all. We are all just humans – imperfect, but ultimately just trying to find happiness.

10. Take responsibility.

A person who takes responsibility for their actions will always be better off than someone who doesn’t take responsibility.

Responsibility is the acceptance of our personal power.

The idea is that we do have some control over our lives, but only if we become more conscious of the actions we take on a daily, moment-by-moment, basis.

The problem is most people go through life similar to a puppet on strings – they take little responsibility for their life situation – and instead consider themselves to be merely a victim of outside circumstance.

This process of “victimization” is the opposite of taking responsibility. Victimization is when we believe that everything negative in our life is due to some external force that we have no control over.

But taking control of the negativity in our lives requires that we first take SOME responsibility and accept that we play a causal role in how our lives end up.

Of course, this doesn’t mean we have complete 100% power over our reality (that would be taking it to an extreme). Clearly, as I mentioned in point 3 – “Accept the things you can’t change,” there are always some limitations to how much we can improve ourselves.

The really important thing is that we learn to distinguish what aspects of our lives are (and aren’t) in our control, then we assign responsibility to ourselves when it’s appropriate. Only then can we really take conscious control over our lives and build healthy self-esteem.

Bonus video: Katt Williams on “Self-Esteem” (Warning: NSFW language)

Anxiety disorders affect between 13-18% of the general population, but the truth is we all experience different forms of anxiety throughout our lives. An anxious mental state is often defined by feelings of fear, worry, uneasiness, or dread. It is often future-oriented, meaning that our anxieties are directed toward possible threats or negative experiences that haven’t yet happened.

In the real world, most of us experience anxiety in varying degrees depending on the situation. It isn’t always a bad thing, as some anxiety can motivate us to re-plan or re-think a situation before acting. However, excessive anxiety can be crippling to a point where we can’t decide, we don’t take action, or we mess up when the event finally comes.

Different Forms of Anxiety.

Anxiety can come in many different forms depending on what it is that triggers our feelings of fear, worry, or dread. These three types of anxiety are often the most common types discussed in modern psychology research, but there are probably other types of anxiety that don’t fit so neatly in these categories (specific phobias, existential anxiety, death anxiety, etc.) Nevertheless, these are the types of anxiety I will be referring to in this post:

Social Anxiety

Social anxiety is a fear or worry about social situations. We may feel uncomfortable or avoid environments that involve large groups of people (like school, work, public speeches, high school reunions, etc.) or we may even feel uncomfortable or avoid certain kinds of 1-to-1 interactions (like job interviews, dating, interacting with a stranger for the first time, or meeting a celebrity).

Most people feel some kind of anxiety in these situations but it varies greatly from person to person. Some people may feel more comfortable in groups, while others feel more comfortable during 1-to-1 interactions. Some people may feel more comfortable talking to familiar faces, while others feel more comfortable meeting someone for the first time. It really depends on the environment and the person.

For more on social anxiety, and how to overcome it, check out Sean Cooper’s The Shyness and Social Anxiety System.

Performance Anxiety

Unlike social anxiety, performance anxiety is a fear or worry about performances, such as a student taking a final exam at school, or a musician performing on stage, or an athlete playing at a big sports game. We worry that we won’t do our best, or that we will mess up or lose, and that anxiety can actually inhibit us from performing to our maximum capacity (or even performing at all, for example due to too much “stage fright”).

Instead of focusing on what we need to get done to succeed, we become more focused on all the ways things that may go wrong. This can sometimes become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Our thoughts make us more uncomfortable and ill prepared, and then those thoughts lead to actions that reinforce our previous conceptions.

Choice Anxiety

Choice anxiety is an anxiety rooted in uncertainty when making decisions. The truth is that none of us can act or make a decision with full knowledge of what the consequences will be; the universe is just too complex, and our minds aren’t capable of completely understanding it. Due to this, we often feel anxiety when making a big decision in our life, because we don’t know if we will make the best possible choice.

Some common big decisions we need to make throughout our lives include: what college to go to, what career to pursue, who to date/marry, where to live, what kind of car to drive, etc.

We make decisions everyday and we have to face the “opportunity costs” from choosing one option over another. Some research suggests that the more options we have to choose from, the more difficult it is to make a decision. They claim that having more options leads to a higher “opportunity cost” (theoretically: the more we have to choose from, the more we miss out on), and when this opportunity cost becomes too big we can often suffer from paralysis by analysis. Paralysis by analysis inhibits us from making ANY decision because we are so lost on what the right course of action is.

I’m sure that you’ve experienced these kinds of anxieties through your life to varying degrees. That’s good. A lot of our anxiety can be healthy and natural. However, when it starts interfering with how we want to live our lives, then it can become a problem that we need to deal with. The first step toward dealing with this problem is identifying some of the potential causes of our anxiety, then we can determine what are the best ways to treat it.

The Most Common Causes of Anxiety

There are a lot of factors that can contribute to our anxiety (and our mental health more generally). In this section, I am going to discuss some of the most common causes of anxiety, and also some potential treatment options for each one. However, it’s important to remember that because our anxiety can be due to such a wide array of different variables, it is often better to integrate several treatment options simultaneously.

Genes

Certain gene variants may be associated with greater levels of anxiety. We all have a different biological make-up, and sometimes individuals may experience increased levels of anxiety for no other reason but that it is embedded in their genetic code. These genes essentially cause chemical imbalances in the brain that leader to your anxiety.

Treatment options: If your anxiety is driven by your biology it may be possible to get prescribed medication from a professional psychiatrist. Beware, however, that many of these medications can have negative side effects (you may go through several different medications before finding one that works best – a good psychiatrist will help you through this process). Also beware that if your anxiety is caused by other factors than medication will only serve as a quick fix, but it won’t solve the deeper issues in your life. You may need to supplement your medication with other treatments.

Health

Anxiety can also be caused due to physical inactivity and poor diet. When we don’t treat our bodies right then that can often have an effect on our mental states.

If we don’t eat balanced meals and get all the nutrition we need, that often means our brains aren’t getting enough nutrition either. This inhibits our brains from functionally as efficiently as they could be, which could very well become a contributor to higher levels of anxiety.

Physical activity is also crucial to both our physical and mental health. Running, playing sports, going to the gym, dancing, and anything that provides exercise is a great way to relieve stress and anxiety that may build up throughout the days or weeks. It’s important that we have a way to channel hormones (like adrenaline and cortisol) in positive and healthy ways, otherwise they manifest themselves as stress and anxiety.

Treatment options: If you don’t already take good care of your body, you’d probably be surprised of just how much less stressed and anxious you’d be if you started taking better care of your health. Try doing little things like replacing soda with water, eating less cake, going for a jog several times a week, or being more mindful of what you eat, and you’ll begin to feel better both physically and mentally.

Psychology (our thoughts and beliefs)

Many psychologists believe that our thoughts and beliefs are some of the biggest contributors to our mood and anxiety. When we look at our lives from a certain perspective or worldview, we may become more anxious than if we reframed our perspective to something different and more productive. One simple example: If you go into a date or a job interview believing that “I’m not good enough,” then you set yourself up to have an anxiety-driven experience. However, if you reframed your perspective, and instead you saw yourself coming from a place of strength or value, then you would probably be less likely to be as anxious.

Treatment options: It’s important to be mindful of the thoughts and beliefs that drive our mood and behavior. If we discover that our thoughts inhibit us from acting appropriately, then it may be appropriate to adjust those beliefs or replace them with something new. For more on this approach you can check out “Social Anxiety and CBT.”

For more on how to use psychology and Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy to overcome anxiety, check out Sean Cooper’s The Shyness and Social Anxiety System.

History

Our personal history and past experiences can also lead to more anxiety in the future. If we have a poor track record of job interviews or dates, then we may think we are inherently incapable of succeeding in these domains of life.

Early psychologists theorized that our self-esteem could be calculated by taking our successes and subtracting them with our failures. The more we succeed, the greater our self-esteem. While this theory definitely doesn’t depict the full picture of self-esteem, it does provide insight into one factor that can influence our self-perception.

Treatment options: It’s important to not let past failures dictate our self-esteem or anxiety about a situation, but when we start accumulating successes it can often become easier to keep ourselves motivated to overcome obstacles in the future. Keep this in mind, reflect on success for inspiration, and you can begin to turn your history around.

Environment

It is also likely that our anxiety is caused by a novel or unfamiliar environment. Anxiety can often be a rational response to an unknown environment because we never quite know what will happen or what risks or at stake. Our anxiety therefore signals to us that we are in danger, and often times this can rightfully inhibit us from taking part in behavior that we may sense as too risky.

Of course, there are also some environments that we may fear irrationally. We may understand that it is a lot safer to take a plane than drive a car, but our anxiety remains persistent despite understanding the risks at stake.

Treatment options: One way to treat these irrational anxieties is through something known as exposure therapy. Basically, we gradually expose ourselves to these environments until we become more and more comfortable with them. This kind of therapy largely makes up the “behavioral” component in Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy. I also elaborate on this more in “Social Anxiety and CBT.”

These are some of the most common causes of anxiety that I know of, although I’m sure there may be other causes that don’t necessarily fit in any of these categories. As you can also probably tell by now, there is a good chance that your anxiety is a combination of one or more of these factors. What makes you “you” – and what determines your thoughts and mood – is a very complex and interconnected process. But hopefully by reading through some of these causes you now have a greater understanding of what may be the driving forces behind your anxiety.

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