Psychology is clear that our childhood and early experiences can have a massive influence on our happiness and well-being later in life. Here are 7 ingredients to a positive childhood.
Psychology research is clear that our childhood and early experiences can have a massive influence on our happiness and well-being later in life.
While most of this research has focused on how negative experiences can impact our mental health into adulthood (such as poverty, abuse, or neglect), a new study published in the scientific journal JAMA Pediatrics looked into how early positive experiences can influence mental health in a good way.
First, this article will review the key findings behind Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE), then we’ll go into what the researchers found out about Positive Childhood Experiences (PCE).
Keep in mind that learning how our childhood influences our mental health can be an important part of self-awareness and better understanding our current situation. I’ve written before about the importance of paying attention to family patterns.
However, we don’t need to think of these patterns as set in stone – or that we are predestined to have terrible lives if we have bad childhoods.
Your past can influence your future, but it doesn’t have to dictate it. There is always room for growth and improvement. And while you can’t change your past, you can change how you respond to it and what you choose to do with it going forward.
That’s an important reminder I wanted to share before we get into the rest of the article…
Adverse Childhood Experiences
Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) can be broken down into 3 main parts: abuse, neglect, and household dysfunction.
Early experiences of abuse can include physical, emotional, and sexual. Early experiences of neglect include physical (food/shelter) and psychological (lack of attention/emotional support). And early experiences of household dysfunction can include divorce, one of your parents having drug or alcohol problems, living with someone who has a mental illness, a parent being incarcerated, or one of your parents being abused by the other.
All of these factors can contribute to a very difficult environment for a child that can have long-lasting effects on their psychology and well-being.
Source: Centers for Disease Control and Prevention/Robert Wood Johnson Foundation
Psychologists measure a person’s “ACE” score out of 10. So if you can relate to 4 of these experiences, your ACE score would be 4/10.
Many people experience at least one ACE, and they can often be more common than we realize. Research shows the most common ACEs include emotional abuse (34.42%), parental separation or divorce (27.63%), and household substance abuse (27.56%).
Understanding what ACEs you’ve experienced can help give you a better understanding of yourself and your current situation. Hopefully it shows you that the way you are is not necessarily your fault – and many of the factors that influence us at an early age are outside of our control.
While ACEs can be incredibly difficult to overcome, it is not impossible. Many people can channel those experiences to do something meaningful in their lives, such as helping others who have gone through a similar situation.
And in fact, new studies show that individuals who have gone through adversity can often be more empathetic and compassionate toward others (likely because they are more attuned to other’s suffering). So that can certainly be one way you turn your past into a strength.
Positive Childhood Experiences
Now let’s switch our focus to what psychologists have identified as “Positive Childhood Experiences” (PCE).
These are early factors that can influence our mental health independently of Adverse Childhood Experiences, so even those who have experienced an ACE were shown to have better mental health if they also had PCEs.
The researchers identified 7 key factors that are included in Positive Childhood Experiences. Find out which ones you can relate to below.
Agree or Disagree: “Before the age of 18, I was…”
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Able to talk with the family about my feelings
Felt that my family stood by me during difficult times
Enjoyed participating in community traditions
Felt a sense of belonging in high school
Felt supported by friends
Had at least two non-parent adults who took a genuine interest in me
Felt safe and protected by an adult in my home
Psychologists measure a person’s “PCE” score out of 7. So if you can relate to 3 of these experiences, your PCE score would be 3/7.
Keep in mind these factors are independent of ACE. So if you are missing some of these (or all of these), it’s not necessarily a sign of poor mental health. However, the more Positive Childhood Experiences you’ve had, the greater likelihood of strong mental health and well-being.
It’s important to note that almost ALL of these “Positive Childhood Experiences” include relationships and social support in one form or another, which research shows is one of the best ways to protect individuals who have gone through adversity.
For example, a new study published in Child Abuse and Neglect found that for children who went through a traumatic experience (such as divorce or death of a loved one), a good neighbor or teacher could help improve their long-term health and well-being.
Social support is probably one of the most important needs for human beings in general. And relationships are a fundamental pillar behind building a happy and meaningful life.
For parents, this is hopefully valuable input to consider when raising children (especially in difficult circumstances). For others, I hope that learning the ways our childhood can influence us is a stepping stone toward improving ourselves and living a better life.
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