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When we feel really bad about something and we look toward others for social support, what are we really searching for?
Do we want them to give us positive advice and make us feel better about our situation, or do we want them to just accept our feelings and let us know they are healthy and normal to have?
In a recent study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, researchers looked at how individuals can best provide social support to those who suffer from negative emotions and low self-esteem.
What they found was that individuals with low self-esteem didn’t respond well to advice like “cheer up” or “look on the bright side.” Instead, the type of social support they were looking for was negative validation.