It takes up a lot of unnecessary energy to always be positive – and I’m not convinced it’s the healthiest way to go about life. Worst of all, I just feel like a damn phony every time I plaster on a smile knowing I’m really in a bad mood.

Why can’t I permit myself be in a bad mood every now and then?

Sometimes shit happens: I get upset, I get frustrated, I get angry, I get jealous. These are a part of being human, so why shouldn’t I be allowed to feel them from time-to-time?

I feel that to live any other way is self-denial. We should train ourselves to see the good and the bad as two parts of the same whole. Emotional intelligence requires that we listen to and accept all emotions, because each can have something valuable to offer. Emotions are a resource, not a crutch.

This is what has always bothered me about the positive movement. So many people in it are all “POSITIVE POSITIVE POSITIVE!” They force a smile on their face and speak with a superficially chirpy tone at all times. I can’t help but think of it as a way of ignoring reality. When something negative happens, I imagine they push it deep down into their soul, then go on their merry ways.

It’s not healthy. When the allure of a positive mindset overtakes our willingness to accept reality – there are consequences. Take, for example, the recent blood on the hands of The Secret. One of the leaders of the “Law of Attraction” movement, James Arthur Ray, was recently found guilty for negligent homicide due to 2 deaths and 18 hospitalizations of attendees during his “Spiritual Warrior” retreat. The participants apparently went 2 days without water and were then left alone in a desert on a “vision quest.” The circumstances were dangerous and outrageous, but Ray believed that the power of belief could overcome them. He was wrong, and real damage was done.

When you are dehydrated and you have a thirst for water, that is not a figment of your imagination, but a feeling that reflects your reality.

A similar thing can be said for other feelings and emotions. When we feel sadness after the death of a loved one, or fear when our lives are actually at stake, those are natural and rational reactions to those kind of events. Those feelings aren’t there to be ignored, but to be acknowledged and listened to.

We should permit ourselves to be negative because we never know when those negative feelings might be telling us something important.

Embracing your shadow every now and then.

Sometimes, I like to go a step beyond permission. Sometimes, I think it’s appropriate to even provoke “negative feelings” in order to express them and release them (in a healthy and safe way). I think acknowledging the “lows” also gives us a greater appreciation of the “highs.”

I think that’s why people enjoy the occasional thrills of a roller coaster or scary movie. Sometimes, it’s exciting to be afraid. Sometimes, it’s healthy to be sad. I think it helps remind us the full-range of being human. I think it helps us exercise feelings that we may sometimes suppress or avoid.

That’s why I like a lot of provocative movies, music, entertainment, and art. It provides a healthy release for me. It gives me a chance to express the full-range of my character in a way that doesn’t harm myself or others.

Why do people like watching movies such as Requiem for a Dream, or Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, or Saw IV? Rarely does anything “good” happen in these movies, instead most of it is people’s lives being ruined. Yet people like to live vicariously through these movie characters, even if it is a situation they would never want to be in for real.

Perhaps it is just “neat” to be able to share an experience even though it’s not really happening to us. Or maybe it’s deeper than that. Maybe it somehow leaves us with a newer appreciation for life.

When I think of these things I am reminded of the Stoic concept of “negative visualization.” The Stoics would often imagine themselves in worst cast scenarios because they found that it made them more grateful for what they do have in life, not what they don’t.

In the same way, I think watching movies that take us to an extreme can actually provide us with a new balanced and healthy perspective on our own lives.

And I believe this also applies to other forms of art or personal expression: music, writing, poetry, sculpting, photography, dancing, cooking, fashion – anything that helps you with that emotional release. When people give themselves an avenue to constructively channel negative emotions, they can better navigate through the ebbs and flows of life.

The Yin-Yang Theory of Mental Health: Don’t ignore the ebbs.

The key here is to not ignore the ebbs. They are really there. Sometimes life has difficulties, sometimes we feel down. These aren’t aspects of life we should or can avoid.

Instead, we can learn how to better manage through these difficulties, perhaps even embrace them (to some extent) by seeing them as a means of growth, character-building, and balance.

I sometimes think of this as the yin-yang theory of mental health. The truth is that the dichotomy between “negative” and “positive” is really illusory. They aren’t separate. They are two sides of the same river, and you can’t have one side without the other. They come together.

This idea of “interdependence” is best depicted in the symbol of a Yin-Yang:

A yin-yang symbolizes many of the dualities we experience throughout life. Notice how even in white, there is a bit of black; and even in black, there is a bit of white. This represents the interdependence between many dichotomies we experience throughout life.

Thought exercise: How can you define darkness without defining light? What about success or failure, life or death, happiness or suffering?

Through contemplation you’ll often find that these concepts aren’t separate, but in fact intrinsically interconnected. They are two parts of the same process. This holds true for most of the ebbs and flows we experience throughout life. We simply cannot have one without having the other.

(If you’re interested in this you may also be interested in my article: Depression: The Yin of Happiness).

My biggest point here is to not be so dismissive of your negative emotions. That can be a trap that many “positive thinkers” fall into, but what they don’t realize is that they are ignoring half of who they really are.

There is a great benefit in paying attention and acknowledging the full-range of what it means to be human. Embracing all sides of life often helps us to manage our expectations, by giving us a more balanced worldview, and consequently we become more satisfied with our lives as a whole (no matter what it has to throw at us).

Materials needed

• Some kind of microphone, MP3 recorder, or way of recording your voice.
• Basic audio editing software (Audacity is a popular free one. There are probably some options that come with your computer too – I used Garageband.)
• If you already have some talent with music feel free to incorporate that.

What is hypnosis?

Think of hypnosis as nothing more than suggestion. Whether you are talking to a friend, listening to something on the radio, watching a movie, or just thinking a thought – you are being suggested some sort of idea.

Bad hypnosis is when the suggestion doesn’t hook. It goes in one ear and out the other and we remain unaffected. Maybe we were just too bored or apathetic to really pay attention to what was being suggested or our critical mind found the suggestion to be bogus.

Good hypnosis is when a suggestion captivates you and creates a change. It is like being moved by a really compelling movie. Anything that peaks your interest and makes you tune in more intently can be considered a form of good hypnosis, like a compelling speech or even watching the World Series. It concentrates your attention and keeps your mind engaged.

How do affirmations relate to hypnosis?

A popular form of hypnosis within the personal development niche is affirmations. When the technique was first introduced as a tool for psychotherapy by Emile Coue in the late 19th century, when it was first called autosuggestion.

If you don’t yet know what an affirmation is it is basically this: you create suggestions for yourself towards certain changes in feelings, thoughts, or behaviors. For example:

• I will be more friendly to people I don’t know.
• I will try not to overreact when I get angry.
• I will spend more time at the gym.
• I will pay better attention to my eating habits.

These are all affirmations but you can structure them in all kinds of different ways. Different language patterns may be more or less effective depending on the suggestion and the person being suggested to. Since you are writing your own suggestions, you should experiment and find what ways work best for you.

Writing your own script

What types of suggestions do you think will work best on you? This part takes a bit of experimentation and practice. You won’t necessarily nail it your first short.

Some people are more suggestible when they are being directly commanded to do something: “Be a better listener! Study more! Watch less TV!”

Other people are more suggestible when they are given options to compare, “Imagine what your grades would be like if you didn’t study more? Now, imagine what your grades would be like if you did study more?” This is called an indirect suggestion – because there is an implicit message that your grades would most likely be better if you studied more.

For your first script, I recommend trying out both direct and indirect suggestions. Don’t be afraid to also incorporate things to visualize by starting sentences with,

• “Picture this….”
• “Visualize that…”
• “Imagine if…”
• “See what happens when….”

The more vivid you make your suggestions, the more captivating and effective they will be. People who have a naturally tendency towards good story telling or a strong imagination will have a distinct advantages over those who don’t – but it is a skill that we can all develop with practice.

Try to make your first script a good 2-3 pages, double spaced, 12 sized font. This should make your hypnosis track about 5-7 minutes if you pace your delivery appropriately. You can structure the script in different ways or you can make it more stream-of-conscious – it really depends on the message you want to get across. Some scripts are designed to drive home a single point or lesson, while others are designed to simply develop a general good sense of well-being and motivation.

The voice and delivery

Voice and delivery can be important in how suggestible your message is but again it depends on the type of suggestion and also the person being suggested to. Your tone matters. For example you wouldn’t want to screech out “Relax!!!” when you want someone to be in a relaxed state. Similarly you don’t want to have a boring and apathetic voice when you say, “Be sexy and fun around others!”

Experiment, experiment, experiment! Sometimes listening to a slow and drone-y voice can heighten your trance, while other times it can put you to sleep. You don’t want to fall asleep. You want to be engaged. Hypnosis is most effective when it is an adventure. Add different colors and dynamics to your voice to amplify the importance of the message and keep your attention fixated.

When you read the script (or even if you are doing an impromptu script) you want to role play the experience as you speak it. You want to be there as you tell the story. The more engaged you are when you deliver, the more engaged you will be when you listen back. It is just a basic rule of all good communication.

How to butter up your final product

Once you are done recording the main script, there are certain things you can do to make the listen even more attractive and enjoyable.

You could add music that compliments the message. Good music for hypnosis should fit well in the background and not take away from the language of the track. It should be designed to create a certain mood or feeling. Sometimes a sense of inspiration or awe can make the strongest impression.

You can create another overlaying script. Often practiced in the form of “dual induction hypnosis,” it is when two hypnotists are giving suggestions at the same time. With the wonders of modern technology, you can create a dual induction all by yourself. With some basic audio editing you can even pan one voice to the left and the other voice to the right. So you will have a different exchange of suggestions going into each ear. This can be used as a way to create stimulus overload, often resulting in confusion, which is a very great way to amplify trance states.

Add effects to the voices. A little bit of echo and reverb never hurt anyone. Sure, it may make your voice sound like some robot from a cheesy 80s scifi movie, but it can make your voice easier to listen to and be fixated on. For “edginess” you can add some distortion or flanger. Most basic audio-editing softwares (including Audacity which I recommended above) have some pre-packaged effects that you should be able to use.

Do panning and volume changes throughout the track. This may be something that only experienced audiophiles can do, but by having your voice shifting between speakers and changing volumes is one really fantastic way to keep your track engaging.

My example

You can download my first attempt here (approx: 10:20, 14mb) . My original intention was to do a dual induction: with self-improvement suggestions on one side and world-improvement suggestions on the other side.

I didn’t write a script for this one, just recorded each track individually, stream-of-consciousness. Each recording was 10 minutes and then I just overlapped them and added some reverb, echo, and distortion (only because I felt my voice sounded too dry and weak without the effects).

After the scripts were recorded I created a simple synthesizer sample using Reason (it is a program for electronic music makers). I basically improvised an organ/space-y synth sound to go with the suggestions.

Things I learned to help improve future recordings:

• I need to make my voice more animated.
• The music is a bit cheesy and simple, but it does have an interesting drone/trance-inducing effect.
• Because I didn’t write a script, the message of the audio is a bit scattered and incoherent. Creating this kind of confusion isn’t necessarily bad for creating a hypnotic effect, but writing a script with something more coherent and structured is usually better.
• There will always be room for improvement whether it be writing better scripts, stronger vocal delivery, or even becoming a more intent listener to the final product.

Things I learned from the creative process in general:

• Making your own self-hypnosis tracks can be really fun.
• The act of putting together the project in-itself is a great exercise in personal development.
• It is a great way to express yourself.

Listen to it

Once you finish your creation you will probably be eager to listen (and re-listen) to it. I recommend doing this whenever you have time set aside to let go of your earthly obligations; it could be early in the morning before you get to work or late at night before bed.

Try listening to it every other day for a week and then continue with it on a weekly basis. Consider it your daily mantra or prayer, a healthy reminder of the things that matter to you in life and the things you want to improve.

Don’t be afraid to also listen to it with a critical eye. Jot down some ways you can improve your next recording. Pay extra attention to which suggestions “clicked” with you and which ones just passed by. Work on developing better language, better delivery, and more colorful and dynamic tracks. Follow these principles and you will be the king of your world in no time. I mean it.

Image Credit

In this post, I set out to describe what I feel are the greatest benefits of exercising creativity. How do they appeal to our interests and how do they build character? In the second half of this post I will describe different ways we can be artistic, even when we have limited skills in the artistic domain. By the end of this post I want readers, both artists and non-artists, to walk away with an affirmed belief that creativity is something inherent in all of man; similarly, it is something that we must all integrate into our lifestyles.

I can’t answer Maslow’s question because I find it hard to fathom why an individual would intentionally avoid pursuing an art. However, some people may feel that they are just not creative, maybe they believe you have to be born with it so – because of this – they ignore opportunities to express themselves creatively.

But the benefits of being creative far outweigh a life without expression. In fact, being creative can also benefit our lives in ways we may not have initially thought, by helping us deal with conflicts and build self-worth.

Expressing your ideas

One of the most obvious advantages of being creative is that it gives us a chance to express our ideas. Through our production of art, we literally turn our feelings and ideas into reality. Upon completing a creative work we feel more understood, perhaps even as if a weight has been lifted off of our shoulders. There are some things that go beyond words and art gives us a modality to express those facets of reality.

Resolving deep conflicts

Sometimes we go through events in life that can cause conflict that never seems to go away. Maybe its a past relationship you can’t seem to get over or a traumatic event that still haunts you. Art gives us a way to let go of these experiences. It allows us to fulfill a hunger that can no longer be satisfied by external conditions, so we must transform ourselves from the inside. Creativity is the alchemy that guides us toward reconciliation with our past. I have looked into this in such articles as, “Art Therapy And Mental Illness,” where I report on how art therapy is used to treat those with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and other psychological impairments.

Facing fears of failure

Of all the things that hold us back from doing the things we want, fear of failure is one of the most detrimental obstacles to overcome. We learn from our mistakes, yet we are deathly afraid to make any. Maybe we are worried that we will find out something about ourselves that we don’t want to know? Whatever the reason, creative endeavors give us an opportunity to achieve something. And even if our first song or first painting isn’t as spectacular as we first dreamed it to be, the accomplishment itself often gives us a sense of pride and motivation. It tells us to push ourselves forward in other aspects of life. And at the same time it gives us a memory, a mental resource, to draw upon when we face other fears in the future.

Building self-worth

When we face our fears, and we accomplish something that we set out to do, even if we don’t do it all that well because it is something new to us, we begin to feel better about ourselves. We produced something; we have added value to the world, and this fact reflects the value we perceive in our own self. This is the same principle I have touched upon in articles like, “From Self To World Improvement.”

Seeing the world differently

What is creativity? How do we know when something is creative? Often we may say something is creative when it gets us to perceive or think about something in a way we never have before. Sometimes these new ways of seeing can disturb us. Other times they inspire us. Being able to see things from a different perspective requires flexibility. It is a skill that can be developed through mediums of art, and even business, engineering, and science. If we can step out of our normal way of seeing things we can obtain a greater depth of understanding regarding a particular theme or subject. With practice, this flexibility can translate into better decision making and problem solving – abilities that can make rippling changes throughout any area of our life.

Creativity that give us immediate gratification

When I use the term “immediate gratification,” I do not mean that one can just pick up a SLR camera and become a professional photographer overnight. Absolutely not. All creative endeavors take work and dedication in order to reach a certain level of proficiency. However, some mediums we can enjoy more quickly than others. Not everyone can pick up an acoustic guitar and write a riff they are happy with, but many people can spend an afternoon shooting pictures and walk away with a couple to “feel good” about.

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