As we enter the new year, everyone is going through the old tradition of making resolutions and goals, only to later not follow through on any of them.
According to Derek Sivers, part of the problem is we blabber about our goals too much. When we tell people what we want to do, and they acknowledge it, this changes our “social reality.” It feels as though we have already achieved that goal, even though – in the real world – we haven’t yet done any of the necessary work.
It turns out this phenomena has been known for almost a century now. In 1926, Kurt Lewin, founder of social psychology, called it “substitution.” In 1933, Wera Mahler found that when our goals are acknowledged by others they feel more real in our minds. In 1982, Peter Gollwitzer wrote a whole book about the phenomena, and in 2009 he did several new studies.
In the studies, Gollwitzer gathered 163 people across 4 separate tests. He had everyone write down a personal goal, and then half of them announced their commitment to the goal to the room, while the other half didn’t.
Then, everyone was given 45 minutes of work that would directly lead them closer to achieving their goal. They were also told they could stop working at anytime.
Those who kept their mouths shut worked the entire 45 minutes (on average), and still thought they had a lot more work to do after they left. However, those who announced their goals to the room only worked for 33 minutes (on average) and later said they felt much closer to achieving their goal.
How can we avoid this false sense of achievement?
Derek Sivers recommends that we keep our goals to ourselves, or share our goals in a less satisfying way. You could say something like, “I need to run this marathon so I need to train 5 times a week, and kick my ass if I don’t.” By acknowledging the hard work you need to do, you won’t be so easily content with just sharing your goal. Also, your friends and family can you hold you more accountable.
So while trying to achieve your future goals, please don’t mistake the talking for the doing. A lot of worthy goals take effort and dedication, and by acknowledging this reality we better equip ourselves for actually following through with what needs to be done (and not just imagining it).
I think sharing your goals openly is a way of giving yourself some accountability. Once the goal is out there, you have a sense responsible for completing it. You won't only let yourself down, but other people as well.
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Sivers mentions this.
In truth, I don't think you should never share your goals. Instead, I think there is a right and a wrong way to do it.
SIMPLY mentioning your goals probably won't give you enough accountability. People spout off their goals all the time during New Years and Lent, but I bet less than half follow through to the end. In short: there is too much talking and not enough doing.
Instead, you should tell your goals to someone who is GOOD at holding you accountable. For example, if I'm going to the gym with my friend Tom every Monday-Friday, he will have a much easier time holding me accountable then if I simply tell my mom over the phone "Oh I'm going to start going to the gym in 2011." If your mom is anything like mine, she will say "That's nice dear," and then never as you about it again. That's poor accountability!
Ultimately, you shouldn't want to count on someone else to hold YOU accountable. It's better off if your sense of responsibility is intrinsically motivated.
Thanks for stopping by Greg!
Thanks for the response Steven! I agree with you. I also recognize that people will make spontaneous goals based on a current emotion instead of a thought out decision. They quickly broadcast this goal or thought only to lose the emotion and the desire for the goal changes.
Thanks for your thoughts!
Greg
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I agree that this is right for some people, but not for others. I think that I'm a person better suited to keeping my goals to myself. However, some people are really more motivated when they tell others. I think the quoted 45 minute study is a bit short and may not give an accurate picture of long term achievement.
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Agreed Kiwi. I will definitely admit that it probably depends on your personality. I'm introverted and intrinsically motivated, so telling my goals to other people never helps. But I can certainly imagine people who work the exact opposite.
Thanks for commenting!
Hey Steven, I just need some clarification. Does this mean we shouldn't share the our goals with others or just our idea of how we're going to reach there. Because, I've been practicing all these for years and in fact, I used to tell people all I want to do and I also asked for their opinions and advices. They've helped me get better actually.
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I think it comes more down to perspective than anything else. As I mention in the last couple paragraphs: if we restate our goals in a less satisfying, more "get things done" kind of way, then it is alright.
The key is to not confuse the talking with the doing.
Thanks for your input!
So true Steven. We just should never confuse the talking with the doing. And sometimes, we just speak more than we want or desire to accomplish just to put good impression of people we're sharing our goals with.
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Yea, I do use that and keep things under the wrap until I am done. Call me superstitious but it works! Anyway, I'm now trying to adopt the habit of being more open and talk about my goals. Will see how it turn out
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It's not superstitious at all. I'd rather surprise everyone with a finished work, then tell people about it as I'm working and constantly be bombarded with questions like "So how's that new project coming along? When can we see it?" It becomes too much of a distraction…I want my space.
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Useful info for 2011
Keep your goals to yourself and acknowledge the hard work ahead.
Looks as though I will have to stop going on about producing an eBook and let myself know how much work I have to do. LOL
Interesting, useful and well presented article.
Thank you Keith. Yes, acknowledge the work. That's crucial here!
The tragedy of goals is that we expect them to do the job for us. They key in my experience has been to deliberately build on my own self-efficacy in general rather than rely on social pressure to nudge me. The trick to that is doing things that build my will over time rather than relying on me constantly testing my limited willpower or relying on other people to provide support. Most self-improvement programs emphasize the crucial importance of telling other people your goals, with the assumption that this creates a social committment that we then have to live up to, as well as a potential support system. They aren't without supporting evidence for that view either, but it is misleading just as is the claim that we shouldn't tell people our goals. That's not really the way we should be thinking about change from my experience.
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"The trick to that is doing things that build my will over time rather than relying on me constantly testing my limited willpower or relying on other people to provide support."
Yes, this is exactly how I feel about it too.
You bring up a good point though. I don't think it necessarily matters one way or the other if we state our goals to others. I think what is most important is the mindset that "I need to do work if this is going to happen."
Sorry, one small possible errata: If the post is referring to the prolific goal psychology researcher at NYU, his name is spelled Gollwitzer, not Gollowitzer.
Thanks, fixed!
Steven, just getting back onto my computer after a complete breakdown and overhaul – now learning a new OS system. I had a great holiday and am anxious to get back and read all your good words here/ I have missed your blog spot.
I don't do resolutions anymore, but I do sometimes share goals, I think I am beginning to see that by sharing I diffuse the energy and shift it away from me and then am asking for others to connect with me by asking about my progress. I think I should stop doing this as it stops my momentum.
I will need to come back soon and re-study your post. It is just too late tonight to get the full benefit
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Glad to have you back! I hope you enjoyed the new year.
>"I don't do resolutions anymore, but I do sometimes share goals."
Same here. I think New Years in particular is a very superficial time to make resolutions. Last year, however, I did make a statement to "Start The New Decade Focusing on Relaxation."
>"I think I am beginning to see that by sharing I diffuse the energy and shift it away from me and then am asking for others to connect with me by asking about my progress. I think I should stop doing this as it stops my momentum."
I can definitely relate to that.
Thanks for coming back!
I am somehow posting as mceown instead of Patricia at Patricias Wisdom…hmmmm something new to figure out as I learn this system.
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It's a great reminder that perception is NOT reality
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Exactly. Mind alone isn't enough. We must apply it to the world. Kinda like my headline "Mind->World->Influence"
Thanks for coming back JD!
Hi Steven.
I am glad I stopped by here. I have watched that TED talk before, and had read a few articles on this subject as well. I liked reading your view on the topic.
Adding some of the toughness of the goal to it when we say it sure does make sense, so we don't get our brain thinking we have easy goodness coming to us.
I treat some of my goals this way, in that I don't really mention them until they are completed. I think this substitution effect has occurred for me many times, so I try to prevent it from occurring again. Once in a while I will mention a goal or two that I have, mostly for variety purposes.
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I completely agree on this and I have often fallen in this trap, we should all talk less and do more. __At the beginning of the year people seem to want to outdo others by bragging about bigger goals, that in the end are completely out of reach.____Kaizen technique is much better as it allows to slowly change your mindset and gives you less to talk about but way more lasting changes.____As always… inspiring post!
Hey… I agree 100%
Oh my gosh I didn’t realize that this does happen. I now realize that I fall victim to the same kind of thinking everyday of my life. This false sense of achievement really is dangerous but very common.